What's That on Your Cheek?
by Baka Deshis
Summary: [OneShot] When Kenji asks his father why he has a cross on his cheek, find out how Kenshin tries to stall. A lot of singing, nonsense and oro's. A little OOC.


**Disclaimer:** If we owned RK, would we be making this? I think I think not! Oh yeah, we don't own 'I Will Survive', Star Wars, The Muffin Man and I'm A Little Teapot too! Hey, we don't even own these words! So we're all just playing around with these things, k?

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**What's that on your cheek?**

"Papa, why do you have a cross on your cheek?" Little Kenji asked his father Kenshin. Kenji was a splitting image of Kenshin, without the cross on his cheek.

"Well, it's a long story." Kenshin patted his son's head.

"Tell it to me then, papa! I like long stories and it's not my bed time yet!" Kenji said, he was eager to find out the tale of the cross, and a father cannot let his own son down.

"Okay, but let me ask you this. Do you think I'm innocent?" Kenshin asked.

"Yes."

"Do you think I'm nice?"

"Yes."

"Would you still think of me as your idol after I tell you this horrible story?"

"Um…"

"Are you afraid of scary stories?"

"No."

"Good!" Kenshin said with a satisfied smile, even though he was worried on the inside. But he knows that it was time his son knew who he really is. "The truth is, do you know the muffin man?"

"The muffin man?" Kenji said awkwardly.

"Yes, the muffin man!"

THWACK! Kenji just hit Kenshin with his bokken.

"Get back to the subject papa! Why do you have a cross on your cheek?"

"Okay… I know you had to know sometime. Well…"

Suddenly, the lights turned off, there was a spotlight on Kenshin and a piano started playing to the tune of 'I Will Survive'.

"Papa, what's happening?" Kenji asked, afraid that something bad has happened.

"First I was afraid,

I was petrified…

"…"

"I was scared that death would avenge to me on anyway

I've got no one else to give

I've go nothing else to leave,

But I am strong

And I know I won't die

No not I

I will survi…"

BWACK! SMACK! "Papa…!" Whined Kenji.

"Okay, okay! First I've got things to settle, wait! Kaoru! What did you teach him? To smack me every second? He's starting to be like you!"

SMACK!

"Oro…"

"Kenshin no baka!" Kaoru just hit Kenshin on the head. She then returned to teach her Kamiya Kasshin Dojo and said to her class, "And that's the right way to hit your husband on the head!"

"Back to the subject on the cross of my cheek, it's a 'stigmata' like Jesus' cross!"

"Who's Jesus?" Kenji asked. "I don't believe you!"

"Okay, I'm lying. The truth is…"

Suddenly, a "Darth Vader-y" song was played in the background.

"I am Darth Vader. Gwahahahahaha, mwahahahaha… Come to the dark side and together we will rule the galaxy. Gwahahahah…. OUCH! What was that for?"

"Oka-san! Oka-san! Papa won't tell me!"

"Tell you what?"

"About what's on his cheek!"

"Tell him, he's brave enough to know!"

"Okay, but let me sing one song."

Then again, another spotlight shone on Kenshin.

"Ladies and gentleman, 'I'm a Little Teapot', with a little modification of course!"

"I'm a little slasher

From battle

I'm a royalist

Killed thousands of people…"

"TWACK! I'm gonna hit you

If you don't tell me

Come on, Papa

Tell me right now!"

"Oro… Not now, I'm too dizzy to do it, my brain is too damaged, I think my skull is cracked…" Kenshin falls down dramatically and put his hand over his forehead. "No… I see the white light; I'm going through the tunnel… Good bye cruel world!"

"But Papa, I never hit you as hard as Oka-san. No one can hit like Oka-san!"

"Arigatou Kenji-Chang!" Kaoru shouted.

"Okay, the truth is, I am the infamous Battousai the slasher from the Tokugawa regime and I got the cross on my cheek when I was killing…"

"STOP! I don't want to hear anymore! I already know and I am going to have nightmares tonight!"

"…"

"I can't hear you! La la la la la…"

_20 years later…_

"Hey kids!"

"Gramps!"

"Okay children, go and play with Gramps." Kenji said to his children.

"Gramps, how did you get the cross on your cheek?"

"Well, it's a long story… But let me ask you. Do you know the muffin man?"

**Finish!**

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(**A/N**: Anyway, how'd you like it? Praise or flame, just review! We love your comments!)

**M**o**s**h**i**i


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